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Friday, December 17, 2010

Because I let you.

It was the annual Christmas party.

50 people crammed in my kitchen living room area? Hello Sardines can.

Jayden just wanted to play a game.

"Ryan, can we play Break the Ice?"
"KacyAnn, can we play checkers?"

"Not right now buddy, sorry."
"I have to help make the rice, sorry Jayden."

The boy was frustrated. Clearly. Frustrated that no one paid attention to him, no one understood how he felt, no one communicated with him how he was hoping. Then, something interesting happened...

He didn't care.

It's not that he didn't care about me, his mom, or KacyAnn, he just went and found something else to do. Rather than get offended and not like everyone for what they do, he looks past that and moves on.

Interesting-I guess the primary reason that there are so many broken families, hatred of people, and hurt feelings, isn't because you didn't listen to me, or because you hurt me...

It's because I let you.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Buy me somethin'!

I have to admit-I knew how to get what I wanted out of mom.

Dad? Not so much.

"Mom, I promise I'll pay you back."

"Mom, it's only 10 bucks. I'll clean my room real good."

"Dad, can I-" "No."


Every Christmas I've always had lists--no, more like books of things I wanted. Lego toy sets, remote control cars, basketball hoops, anything but clothes! Bleh!

Then a few years ago, my siblings and I decided to give up on our list and work on someone else's. Go find their toys, cars, hoops....and maybe even clothes! Bleh!

I found the gift I really wanted. I found something that took ghosts of Christmas past, present, and future to teach Scrooge...

I found Christmas.

I hope we can all do something to find Christmas inside ourselves...even if it means giving up some of your new clothes...


Wednesday, December 1, 2010

When you know you know, you know?

As per request of someone *cough* Madison Neiswender *cough*

I will tell you about what I did to propose to KacyAnn, and why I'm now a believer of the old cliche, "When you know, you know, you know?"

The day before I proposed I went to build-a-bear with my sister, Jayden and Kaylie. I wanted to get a stuffed animal and then put a recording in the bear of me asking her to marry me. Well- J and K had a blast. Kaylie was set on getting the puppy, and since KacyAnn loves puppies (thank you Sheila) then I thought it would be good.

Jayden was set on getting white and black tennis shoes to dress him up, I was looking around for some clothes and didn't see anything. I was about to just get the Harley Davidson jacket when I saw a little blue costume and a badge on it that said "Prince Charming". Perfect.

So we started off the day by going to the temple. We first went to the Draper temple, but as we walked in there we could tell it was really busy. My plan was to propose at the temple grounds, but with the weather being so windy and cold, I was deciding quickly that I was going to have to about face that plan.

We stopped after the temple at my mom's house to do laundry (hey-when you're seriously dating someone you can do stuff like that on a date okay?). KacyAnn had been talking to her brother on the phone for a while, and I realized I couldn't wait any longer. I just had to ask. She hung up with her brother and we were standing there talking. We were about to leave for lunch, and I said, "before we leave, I need you to close your eyes."

"What? Why?" she said. I grab her hands and place them over her eyes and say, "just keep your eyes closed."

At this point it had hit me. All the nerves were shot, all the excitement was coming to the surface.

I was shaking like a leaf.

So much in fact, I couldn't open my temple bag that had the bear and ring in it. I kept trying but that zipper felt like the sword in the stone, and I unfortunately was not King Arthur.

Once I finally opened it, I put the bear in her hands and said "when I tell you to, squeeze your left hand." She did and the bear/puppy said, "I want to be with you for eternity, so I was just wondering-will you marry me?" (Thanks Tiff).

She opened her eyes and I was down on my knee with the ring, and she said yes!

It's been interesting and humbling to see the Lord's hand in my life. There have been several things that have happened in the last year that I believe have prepared both of us for where we are now.